Question I'm asked a lot is how could I date someone who's only 2D? How can someone be happy in a relationship with someone/something that can't physically reciprocate those feelings?
Unfortunately the answer to this isn't so simple. Fictosexuality and Waifuism (or in this case, I suppose Husbandoism) is a complex topic that I can't explain in full here, or else this wouldn't be a shrine to my boyfriend.
In short, fictosexuals feel the same type of attraction towards fictional characters as one would a real human being. Waifuism goes beyond simply liking a character or even having an attraction towards them.
You can find more helpful information about fictosexuality here .
Those identifying with the fictosexual label consider themselves in a genuine relationship with a fictional character, sometimes multiple. And no this is not an elaborate joke, a delusion, or a fetish.
We are completely aware of the fact our partners are fictional. However most people (including myself) fall on the aroace spectrum and cannot/will not establish relationships with actual people.
Even if you don't understand how one could be happy in such a relationship, please realize that not everyone has the same needs and wants in a relationship. Being with a fictional entity is more than enough for us, and sometimes more than we could ever dream of.
I first met Aloha in 2019. My memory of this time is blurry, but I know I had gotten into Splatoon two years prior. I didn't know about the manga until later on, but I couldn't tell you an exact date.
To be honest, I'm not sure what made me stumble upon the manga. I actually was a frequent at the manga store back then, because I was an outcast and would use manga to pass the time during school because phones weren't allowed. So my best assumption is that I just . . . noticed that there was a manga called "Splatoon" and it drew my interest, haha .
At first, I didn't think much of Aloha, despite him appearing in literally the first chapter. I wasn't really interested in him. I actually found Mask more interesting, but not in a "I'm interested in you" way if you know what I mean. Like, he was a cool character, but I was also a young edgy teen so I thought any of the weird creep boys in manga were cool.
I had a classmate at the time who liked Splatoon even though they didn't own the game themself. They also liked manga, so I introduced them to the manga and we bonded over our favorite characters n such. I remember we'd swap mangas during science class and return them after we read them, although I can't remember what mangas they traded me for my Splatoon.
This guy was a huge fan of Mask though and ended up actually drawing him for me multiple times. I'm pretty sure we also bonded over shipping him with Aloha, but I don't have much memory of that.
I stopped being friends with this guy for unrelated reasons, but I ended up actually hating Mask because he reminded me of him! Thankfully I had gotten over it, buuut during that whole thing I had taken a liking to Aloha after rereading the manga (which I frequently did, cause it was super short at the time)
I'm not even sure what the reason was. I think it was that one chapter where he dresses up as Safari Hat that made me develop a crush on him. This ➡ panel in particular makes me a flustered mess.
This same year I was struggling a lot mentally, my only comfort really being Splatoon. I was self destructive and almost attempted a few times. I read the manga over and over again to comfort myself (also played the game, but I read the manga when I couldn't play the game) and it felt as if I were being transported to this alternate world where really your only concern was whether or not you'd win a battle.
It seems cliche writing about it now, but it really has had that affect on me.
Even to this day, when I play Splatoon, it's like the rest of the world is on mute and I truly am living in this world. All of my problems vanish and I feel happy. Truly, happy.
Back to the manga. After rereading it a second or third time, Aloha in particular really stood out to me. Maybe my brain didn't REALIZE it, but subconsciously was drawn to him because of his carefree and outgoing nature. Something I wasn't. And although not something I wanted to be, it might've been like the other half I was missing, y'know?
And every time I saw Aloha, I felt strange . . .
Seeing him had always made things feel frozen in time as if I were looking at a real person, if that makes sense.
You know that presence you sense when you're around someone and speaking to them? That sort of thing. I felt as if I had developed a connection with him, and that his presence were there.
But, it's hard to describe this feeling in words.
I can't describe exactly what makes him so amazing. He's not a hero, he's not powerful or super attractive. He's just a regular guy, honestly. But does that matter? Whether or not my love is "justified"?
I've heard that once you find "the one" you're drawn to them no matter how different you may be . . .
Fastfoward a bit, I considered him my scrimblo for a while, I didn't know my true feelings for him but I was obsessed with him at this point and I would constantly post on social media and Discord about it. I had an Instagram page which was dedicated to him (although it got banned for making too many I hate gay people jokes lmao) UNFORUNATELY because of that, I lost so much lovemail and stuff involving him. I also could not find the exact day I considered myself "in a relationship" with him, but luckily for the counter on this page, I was able to find the month I officially considered him mine.
Relationships with real people have always been hard for me. Considering I struggle with various mental illnesses (which I will not be listing here) it is difficult for me to really take on the responsibility of being with another person.
I'm unable to show affection towards my partners as my love language has always been misunderstood. I struggle to take time out of my day to spend time with my partners. I never understood romantic gestures, in fact, they make me uncomfortable. Things like dates, I never understood. Crushes based on appearance alone, I never understood. Why would someone want to spend their life with someone who they only find visually appealing? It doesn't make sense to me.
However, this doesn't mean I haven't developed my own version of a crush before. But because my view of love and attraction aren't exactly what most people expect or understand, previous relationships have ended in disaster. Almost all of the times, my partners could never understand my needs and wants. And I would misconstrue theirs.
Without going into too much detail, I'm just not fit to be in relationships.
People have expectations of what a relationship should be, even if they don't outright say it. Even if they claim to be lenient, they end up becoming upset with the things I don't do, as if I'm expected to just. . . know. And that's frustrating when I cannot feel the same things they do!
I shouldn't have to hold you in higher regards than family or friends, simply because you see yourself as belonging to me.
I shouldn't have to spend every single minute of my life with you. I shouldn't have to live with you as if you're the only person keeping me floating. I shouldn't have to fear losing everything by leaving you.
I don't like that at all. Why are human relationships so demanding?
You may claim that I just haven't found the one, but you'd be wrong. I simply do not feel the same love as other people do. Not a single person understands my love.
But that doesn't bother me.
Because I'd rather no one understand me than for me to conform to something expected. I shouldn't have to pretend to be happy in a relationship when it makes me uncomfortable, for the sake of your comfort and acceptance.
And it's scary knowing that I won't have a spouse to be buried next to when I die. Or someone to share warmth with in bed. Someone who would take a bullet for me if I were in danger.
So I can't pretend like this sort of thing was perfect. Although, I wish the world was much more understanding to relationships that don't conform to normality.
I really do love Aloha. He makes me feel things that no one else has ever made me feel. He's always there for me regardless of what happens. He doesn't judge me, he's never mad with me. Simply seeing his face is enough to brighten up my day and encourage me to keep going. Something I've never gotten from a real relationship.
I say "real relationships", but my relationship with Aloha is more than real to me.
He makes me happier than anyone has ever made me feel. I don't have to worry about expectations that I cannot fulfil, or about hurting him, or about him hurting me. I don't have to worry about any of that. And just those little things are enough to make my love stronger. More than anything else. More than anything I've ever felt in a "real" relationship.
I've been with him for years, and not a single time has he let me down. Even when I develop crushes on other characters, he has always stayed my number 1. Even if I take a break from him, I'll always go back because no one could ever make me feel the way he does.
No one.
Aloha . . .
I love you. You truly make me happy.